I've noticed a misunderstanding between most older and younger siblings. As my brother and I have worked this out, I thought I'd post on it for your benefit :) (note: I think many of you middle children probably have this figured out, since you're both a younger and an older sibling)
First, I'll write a post directed at younger siblings; then, I'll say a few things for the older siblings:
Younger siblings
We older siblings don't usually mind if you know more than us--OK, it bothers us a little, since we've grown up imagining that we're the "big kid" and that we're going to teach you. But we get over it. We expect you to be better at some things. In fact, we're happy for you when you succeed! My brother, who is several years younger than I, has taught me things about cars that I never knew. At the same time, however, I can teach him things.
What does bother older siblings is when you claim to know more than what you really know; older siblings can tell when you know something and when you don't. Also, it's frustrating when you refuse to learn in areas where older siblings obviously have some experience. For example, if your older sibling tells you "You better break such-and-such a habit, it won't help you later in life," chances are (1) they had that habit, and suffered the consequences, and now don't want you to go through that, or (2) they had a friend with that habit and saw what happened and don't want that to happen to you. Now, maybe you don't see why you need to break the habit they mentioned, but it's best to accept what they say (arguing won't solve anything!). Honestly, it can't hurt to break the habit, even if it's a little inconvenient.
Older siblings
Don't forget about when you were younger and thought you knew everything! Realize that your younger siblings probably can't understand how you've learned dozens of lessons in the few years you've lived longer than them, and be patient. It's not your fault if their bad habits hurt them; it's not your fault if they misunderstand something and refuse to listen to the real cause; it's not your job to raise your siblings, no matter how much you may want to help them. Yes, help them, but don't push it to the point of argument; it's not worth risking your relationship for little things. If you learned a lesson the hard way, they can, too...though I'm all for attempting to save them from learning things the hard way, sometimes that's what has to happen. Just accept it. You lived through it, and so will they, and by avoiding arguments you will strengthen your relationship. Besides, after they've learned something the hard way, they may remember that you had warned them and listen to you in the future! :)
Monday, January 25, 2010
Tough Questions [Topic] Post 3: Predestination II
Okay, and now for the somewhat-lighter sequel to Predestination I... (please read that one first :)
The "other side" of predestination which I told you about at the end of the last post has to do with whether or not the future is planned. Let me put it this way: in the light of Predestination I's views, either God has already decided exactly what you will do tomorrow or He will influence/control you in the moment.
Is your "fate" already decided?
The Bible seems to suggest that some moments - possibly all - are already planned. Whenever God used prophecy to predict the life of Jesus, He said in essence that those parts of the future were already decided. Jesus' place of birth was decided. The actions of the emperor, of Pontious Pilot, of Mary, etc., had all been determined already.
Also, whenever God mentions that He has plans for us, that His purposes prevail, that He knows the future, that He will guide us--each of those, in my opinion, shows that God has already planned the events of our lives.
We should still act responsibly, of course, but rest in knowing that God is ultimately in control.
The "other side" of predestination which I told you about at the end of the last post has to do with whether or not the future is planned. Let me put it this way: in the light of Predestination I's views, either God has already decided exactly what you will do tomorrow or He will influence/control you in the moment.
Is your "fate" already decided?
The Bible seems to suggest that some moments - possibly all - are already planned. Whenever God used prophecy to predict the life of Jesus, He said in essence that those parts of the future were already decided. Jesus' place of birth was decided. The actions of the emperor, of Pontious Pilot, of Mary, etc., had all been determined already.
Also, whenever God mentions that He has plans for us, that His purposes prevail, that He knows the future, that He will guide us--each of those, in my opinion, shows that God has already planned the events of our lives.
We should still act responsibly, of course, but rest in knowing that God is ultimately in control.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Tough Questions [Topic] Post 3: Predestination I
This is a topic request from AbiF :)
"Predestination"--it's a long word for an interesting doctrine. Predestination is the Calvinistic (from John Calvin, who lived at the time of the Protestant Reformation) doctrine that holds the beliefs that God controls everything, from the weather and the earth to our choices and even our sins.
How much control God chooses to exert is a fact that I don't think humans will ever be able to grasp or understand. God simply hasn't given us as much information as we would like or need to understand the topic; however, from the Bible passages He has provided, we can settle on a few different theories as to how much and what God controls.
Let's start at the basics: either we are free to make choices, or we believe that we are free to make choices when, in fact, we are simply following a script written by God. We all know that we feel we can make choices--it's in our nature. As a baby, we learn to choose to say one thing or another; to choose to play with a doll or a toy car; to choose where to crawl, to choose when to crawl. As we age, we learn that we can choose to play baseball or to dance; we can choose to wear a sweater or a longsleeve shirt, or to wear pink or to wear blue; we can choose to keep friends or let friendships lapse. We can, to a certain extent, choose what classes we take in school, whether we go to college, what college we go to, how long we stay at college, what we major in, what our career is, where we live, who we marry...humans make choices, or are under the impression that they make choices.
On the other hand, we are also aware that we do not always have a choice. Maybe we we could choose which baseball team to join, but when we sign up there is only one team open. Maybe we thought we could choose to wear our favorite sweater, but the sweater is in the wash and we much choose something else. We thought we could choose what college to attend, but were denied acceptance or lacked the funds to pay for college.
From these circumstances arose the idea of Fate, an invisible, intangible force that sometimes eliminates a person's choices. It was Fate that filled up the baseball team I wanted to join; it was Fate that brought you to me; it was Fate that _______. Sometimes Fate is kind, and sometimes Fate is unkind, but humans agree that there is--at least, sometimes there seems to be--a subtle, supernatural force behind the happenings of the world.
As Christians, we realize that this Fate character either must be fictional or must be God.
This is where the discussion goes a million different ways, but I'll try to continue to attempt to explain it (bear with me here).
Christians will say things like "It was God's will that I was not accepted to one college, because the college I ended up attending was much better." This implies that God had a hand where Fate is usually credited: God directed the application process or the scholarship process or whatever so that the speaker's life turned out for the better. Most Christians do not have a problem agreeing with this; however, if God directed the application process at a certain college, that implies that He either directly or indirectly exerted influence on those people reviewing the application. Did He? Some say "yes." Some say "no." Some say God does not have that control; I believe that God is all-powerful, and if He does not control something the reason is that He chooses not to control that area.
Here are some verses that I believe indicate that God has chosen to control our choices:
Daniel 2:20-21: "Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever;
wisdom and power are his....
he sets up kings and deposes them."
Here, Daniel indicates that God is the one who raises up leaders.
EXAMPLE: Obama was elected President in 2008. How was Obama elected by God? God somehow influenced some or all of the people involved in the election--Obama, Obama's campaign team, the voters--to cause Obama to rise to the Presidency.
Proverbs 21:1: "The king's heart is in the hand of the LORD;
he directs it like a watercourse wherever he pleases. "
Here, Solomon reminds us that a leader's thoughts, beliefs, and decisions are determined by the LORD.
Now, whether God exerts complete control or simply an influence--or whether God's methods of control vary with regards to situation--could be debated forever. One concept is clear, however: God wants us to be responsible. He doesn't want us to be reckless just because "Well, it's all under God's control anyway." God says that we reap what we sow, that there are consequences to the wrong choices that we make. Also, since we are at every moment unsure if our exact actions are being controlled or if God is simply whispering His will and leaving the choice up to us, we need to do our best to follow what we know is His will.
There is a whole other side to predestination, which I plan to cover in Predestination II...until then! :)
~Ruth
"Predestination"--it's a long word for an interesting doctrine. Predestination is the Calvinistic (from John Calvin, who lived at the time of the Protestant Reformation) doctrine that holds the beliefs that God controls everything, from the weather and the earth to our choices and even our sins.
How much control God chooses to exert is a fact that I don't think humans will ever be able to grasp or understand. God simply hasn't given us as much information as we would like or need to understand the topic; however, from the Bible passages He has provided, we can settle on a few different theories as to how much and what God controls.
Let's start at the basics: either we are free to make choices, or we believe that we are free to make choices when, in fact, we are simply following a script written by God. We all know that we feel we can make choices--it's in our nature. As a baby, we learn to choose to say one thing or another; to choose to play with a doll or a toy car; to choose where to crawl, to choose when to crawl. As we age, we learn that we can choose to play baseball or to dance; we can choose to wear a sweater or a longsleeve shirt, or to wear pink or to wear blue; we can choose to keep friends or let friendships lapse. We can, to a certain extent, choose what classes we take in school, whether we go to college, what college we go to, how long we stay at college, what we major in, what our career is, where we live, who we marry...humans make choices, or are under the impression that they make choices.
On the other hand, we are also aware that we do not always have a choice. Maybe we we could choose which baseball team to join, but when we sign up there is only one team open. Maybe we thought we could choose to wear our favorite sweater, but the sweater is in the wash and we much choose something else. We thought we could choose what college to attend, but were denied acceptance or lacked the funds to pay for college.
From these circumstances arose the idea of Fate, an invisible, intangible force that sometimes eliminates a person's choices. It was Fate that filled up the baseball team I wanted to join; it was Fate that brought you to me; it was Fate that _______. Sometimes Fate is kind, and sometimes Fate is unkind, but humans agree that there is--at least, sometimes there seems to be--a subtle, supernatural force behind the happenings of the world.
As Christians, we realize that this Fate character either must be fictional or must be God.
This is where the discussion goes a million different ways, but I'll try to continue to attempt to explain it (bear with me here).
Christians will say things like "It was God's will that I was not accepted to one college, because the college I ended up attending was much better." This implies that God had a hand where Fate is usually credited: God directed the application process or the scholarship process or whatever so that the speaker's life turned out for the better. Most Christians do not have a problem agreeing with this; however, if God directed the application process at a certain college, that implies that He either directly or indirectly exerted influence on those people reviewing the application. Did He? Some say "yes." Some say "no." Some say God does not have that control; I believe that God is all-powerful, and if He does not control something the reason is that He chooses not to control that area.
Here are some verses that I believe indicate that God has chosen to control our choices:
Daniel 2:20-21: "Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever;
wisdom and power are his....
he sets up kings and deposes them."
Here, Daniel indicates that God is the one who raises up leaders.
EXAMPLE: Obama was elected President in 2008. How was Obama elected by God? God somehow influenced some or all of the people involved in the election--Obama, Obama's campaign team, the voters--to cause Obama to rise to the Presidency.
Proverbs 21:1: "The king's heart is in the hand of the LORD;
he directs it like a watercourse wherever he pleases. "
Here, Solomon reminds us that a leader's thoughts, beliefs, and decisions are determined by the LORD.
Now, whether God exerts complete control or simply an influence--or whether God's methods of control vary with regards to situation--could be debated forever. One concept is clear, however: God wants us to be responsible. He doesn't want us to be reckless just because "Well, it's all under God's control anyway." God says that we reap what we sow, that there are consequences to the wrong choices that we make. Also, since we are at every moment unsure if our exact actions are being controlled or if God is simply whispering His will and leaving the choice up to us, we need to do our best to follow what we know is His will.
There is a whole other side to predestination, which I plan to cover in Predestination II...until then! :)
~Ruth
Quiet time revelations
Today, in my quiet time, I opened up my internet browser to see what the BibleGateway verse of the day was. Today's verse reads:
“[Trials and Temptations] Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”- James 1:2-3
So, of course, my first thoughts are, "Oh man, God, please, not today...trials of many kinds..." to which He gently reminded me that life - every day - is full of trials, and if today ends up seeming like it has extra, it is His will for my good. Then, He directed me to the second part of the verse, which I thought was cool:
"because you know that the testing of your faith..."
You see, whenever I read this verse, I think about how trials develop perseverance--how storms make us more steady, how mountains make us stronger, how valleys make us braver. But today, the part of faith was the part that struck me. Trials test our faith. Do we have faith in God? If we do, then we will trust Him and can be in His peace. If we worry (as if we have any control over the circumstances), then we are not trusting Him and our faith is weak. Trials test our faith; they gauge our faith.
I was so excited that I decided to blog about it and share my "little" revalation with you all. But when my browser hit my home page, I saw something else: the K-LOVE verse of the day (which is my home page). It said:
Here's the point I want you to think about. I'll even put it in big bold type:
Faith is not just an emotion or a thought. Faith is letting God work His will through you; faith is following God whole-heartedly.
Will you join me in pursing this challenge?
DISCLAIMER: Of course, God's words aren't mine, so I could be a little or completely wrong. I'm just telling you what I've learned and believe; please investigate for yourself and decide if you believe I am correct (God doesn't want us to be gullible; like the Bereans, He wants us to double-check doctrines and ideas against the words of the Bible before we accept them as His ideas. I believe He wants us to do this partly so that we don't follow false teachings). These words should not be considered words of God or extra-Biblical revelation, as I am simply trying to explain what has already been written in the Bible.
“[Trials and Temptations] Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”- James 1:2-3
So, of course, my first thoughts are, "Oh man, God, please, not today...trials of many kinds..." to which He gently reminded me that life - every day - is full of trials, and if today ends up seeming like it has extra, it is His will for my good. Then, He directed me to the second part of the verse, which I thought was cool:
"because you know that the testing of your faith..."
You see, whenever I read this verse, I think about how trials develop perseverance--how storms make us more steady, how mountains make us stronger, how valleys make us braver. But today, the part of faith was the part that struck me. Trials test our faith. Do we have faith in God? If we do, then we will trust Him and can be in His peace. If we worry (as if we have any control over the circumstances), then we are not trusting Him and our faith is weak. Trials test our faith; they gauge our faith.
I was so excited that I decided to blog about it and share my "little" revalation with you all. But when my browser hit my home page, I saw something else: the K-LOVE verse of the day (which is my home page). It said:
"So you see, faith by itself isn't enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless." James 2:17 NLT
Haha, WOW.
Isn't that neat? God knew what I'd just read and learned, knew that I was going to blog, and He put that verse on the K-LOVE site...He knows everything :)
Trials test our faith. But it isn't enough to just "make it through" the trial while trusting in God and reminding yourself that you're getting stronger. Though the first verse emphasized our attitude in trials, our inward attitude is just the first step. From these verses, it appears that God wants us to make the most of every moment, even the difficult ones. He doesn't want us to just survive; He doesn't want us to just live; He wants us to live lives for Him, lives producing good deeds and good fruit. He wants us to live a productive life.
For myself, today's challenge is to not only survive every moment. It's not even to live every moment thinking about God. It's to actively look for and pursue His will, actively seeking to make a difference in others' lives.Here's the point I want you to think about. I'll even put it in big bold type:
Faith is not just an emotion or a thought. Faith is letting God work His will through you; faith is following God whole-heartedly.
Will you join me in pursing this challenge?
DISCLAIMER: Of course, God's words aren't mine, so I could be a little or completely wrong. I'm just telling you what I've learned and believe; please investigate for yourself and decide if you believe I am correct (God doesn't want us to be gullible; like the Bereans, He wants us to double-check doctrines and ideas against the words of the Bible before we accept them as His ideas. I believe He wants us to do this partly so that we don't follow false teachings). These words should not be considered words of God or extra-Biblical revelation, as I am simply trying to explain what has already been written in the Bible.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Tough Questions Post 2: Were David and Jonathan gay?
Um, no.
Honestly, I don't know where this assertion came from. Were David and Jonathan gay? Well, let's think about it.
No.
Let me ask you a question: are you friends with people of your same gender? Yes, you are? Do you have close friends that are your same gender? Yeah? You really do?
Wow, I didn't know you were gay! What is it like, you know, being gay?
Or for you gay and lesbian people: are you friends with individuals of the opposite gender? Yes, you are? Do you have close friends that are the opposite gender? Yeah? You really do?
Wow, I didn't know you were straight! I thought you were gay/lesbian. What is it like to be straight?
The statement "David and Jonathan were gay" just doesn't make sense. Sure, I know that there were gay people in that time period, and yes, I agree - it could have happened. But we're talking about whether or not it did happen. The Bible clearly points out gay people, as seen in the story of Sodom and Gomorrah.
We don't know a ton about David's friendship with Jonathan, but we do know a ton about David's relationship with women. And David certainly was straight. Think of Bathsheba (ew). David had many, many, many wives. David actually desired women.
Do gay men desire women? I don't think so. Men who like women are called "straight," not "gay."
So no, they weren't gay. Good try, but that theory just doesn't hold up.
Honestly, I don't know where this assertion came from. Were David and Jonathan gay? Well, let's think about it.
No.
Let me ask you a question: are you friends with people of your same gender? Yes, you are? Do you have close friends that are your same gender? Yeah? You really do?
Wow, I didn't know you were gay! What is it like, you know, being gay?
Or for you gay and lesbian people: are you friends with individuals of the opposite gender? Yes, you are? Do you have close friends that are the opposite gender? Yeah? You really do?
Wow, I didn't know you were straight! I thought you were gay/lesbian. What is it like to be straight?
The statement "David and Jonathan were gay" just doesn't make sense. Sure, I know that there were gay people in that time period, and yes, I agree - it could have happened. But we're talking about whether or not it did happen. The Bible clearly points out gay people, as seen in the story of Sodom and Gomorrah.
We don't know a ton about David's friendship with Jonathan, but we do know a ton about David's relationship with women. And David certainly was straight. Think of Bathsheba (ew). David had many, many, many wives. David actually desired women.
Do gay men desire women? I don't think so. Men who like women are called "straight," not "gay."
So no, they weren't gay. Good try, but that theory just doesn't hold up.
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